“Emotional Independence First, Financial Independence Second” (Michael Dlouhy)
Note: Emotional independence doesn't have to mean emotional flat-lining 
Just got off Mentoring for Free‘s Wednesday Mental Cleanse Call, this time about chapter 2 of Napoleon Hill’s masterpiece “Think and grow rich“, Desire.
We listened to brilliant insights people drew from this chapter.
Apart from all these amazing lesson plans, I want to point one nugget in particular shared by Michael Dlouhy.
He boiled it all down to:”Emotional independence first, financial independence second.”
Wow, read it again:”Emotional independence first, financial independence second.”
That really opened my eyes.
Don’t most people believe that financial independence will assure their emotional independence, myself included ?
But it’s just the other way round, is it not ?
Michael expanded on that and said:”If you get financial independence before or without being emotionally independent, you will blow it up.”
Been there, happened to me, done that to myself.
That’s not all, though.
You as a mentor in network marketing can help other people become emotionally independent without being financially independent yet.
It costs you nothing.
But, however, we might be tempted using our lack of financial independence as an excuse not to help people whole heartedly become emotionally independent.
“I don’t have the money. I can’t afford helping people as a mentor with a servant’s heart.”
Sounds familiar ?
What is your opinion and what are your experiences ?
Ah, before you leave a comment, read this closing quote of Michael’s:”This is not a race, just enjoy the journey.”
I always love your reaction, so please leave me a comment down below with questions, thoughts, or feedback.
And (yes, here’s my call to action) please share this post with your Twitter and Facebook friends by clicking on the share buttons.
I appreciate you telling others.
To a prosperous life,
Oliver Tausend
+1 201 984 5664 office North America (anytime)
+49 1512 9125216 office Germany & other countries (anytime)
Skype ID: guernsey2016 (anytime)
wordpress@olivertausend.com
P.S.: Now go to our public Mental Cleanse forum to read all these brilliant insights from our mastermind team. Enjoy.
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Yes, this took me some time to digest, but it does make great sense. Heard and read some great lesson plans yesterday! I’m looking forward to continuing through the book in the coming months to learn and grow with you and everyone on the 30daymentalcleanse.
Cheers!
Doug
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:38
Hi Doug,
thanks for stopping by. Powerful stuff, right ? I have never heard it that clearly as Michael stated it on the call.
Be blessed
Oliver
P.S.: Please add a picture of you to Gravatar.com that will show up in your future comments you leave with this email-address. Brands yourself perfectly. Here’s how you do it: http://www.sandymaudet.com/how-to-create-your-own-avatar-for-free
[Reply]
That is very insightful. you should have that emotional independence to be able to “secure” your financial independence. Thanks for this. kx
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:37
Hi Kiki,
thanks for your comment. Glad you could relate to this.
Take care
Oliver
[Reply]
Hi Oliver,
Nice article.
Yes, it was a nugget on the call and it has coincided with something I’ve been thinking about over the past while.
Prioritising happiness, not waiting for success, or that next distributor or that new house or whatever the case may be in order for us to be happy, to just be happy now!
Thanks for the inspiration.
Roisin.
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:36
Hi Roisin,
thanks for your comment. If our happiness depends on outside conditions and/or behaviour of other people, we give them power over us, voluntarily. Not a good idea, is it ?
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: adriennesmith40
says:
I totally agree with this Oliver and I have a feeling that a lot of people can relate to this, me included.
I thought I had to have all of that in my grasp before people would want to listen to what I had to say. But emotionally you need to be in that place in order to have the financial independence. Like Michael said, you can have it without the emotional part but it won’t last.
I bet that call was great as all of these teachings are. Thanks for sharing this.
Adrienne recently posted..How To Set Up Social Media Icons In WordPress Using Socialize
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:35
Hi Adrienne,
thanks for your comment. Oh yes, this call was a blast.
That’s particularly tricky: I need this in order for people to listen to me, this shiny object or that degree. It’s just a trap from the lazy part of our brain, is it not ?
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: radu_dascalul
says:
Hey Oliver,
You made a keen distinction in this post. I thought for a long time that you have to own something in order to experience a good feeling: joy, love, gratitude etc.
But this way you have no real freedom-you’re just addicted to an outcome..it it works, you work, if it doesn’t, you’re done.
As Harv Eker said, money will only amplify what you already are. If your feelings are like hell..that must be changed from the inside first.
Well said- offering to somebody emotional freedom, before he actually becomes financially free is a great gift. We all have the power to uplift, at least one person per day. But in order for this to happen we have to see the best in others( even if they don’t see it at that moment).
Beautiful topic you chose for today Oliver!
Thanks for sharing,
Radu
Radu recently posted..7 figure earner reveals his secrets to Crush it online
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:33
Hi Radu,
thanks for your insightful comment. I like this amplification aspect, it is so true. Money – or the lack of it – will reveal who we truly are. Money doesn’t spoil character, it will reveal someone’s spoiled character.
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Thanks Oliver for sharing YOUR wisdom on this topic, it was an eye-opener for ME for sure….
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:32
Hi Luther,
thanks for your comment buddy. Couldn’t agree more with you…
Be blessed
Oliver
P.S.: Please add a picture of you to Gravatar.com that will show up in your future comments you leave with this email-address. Brands yourself perfectly. Here’s how you do it: http://www.sandymaudet.com/how-to-create-your-own-avatar-for-free
[Reply]
Students of Mentoring For Free are receiving a top notch education on self development… We are interested in others discovering who they are to be an asset in your personal life, network marketing, and the World. You have everything You need inside once you cultivate, water and shine light on the seeds already planted inside of You…….
Excellent Post Oliver…
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:31
Hi Rickey,
thanks for your comment. I like that: We have everything it takes to succeed in MLM, but it needs cultivation. So true…
Be blessed
Oliver
P.S.: Please add a picture of you to Gravatar.com that will show up in your future comments you leave with this email-address. Brands yourself perfectly. Here’s how you do it: http://www.sandymaudet.com/how-to-create-your-own-avatar-for-free
[Reply]
Hi, Oliver,
Excellent insight. Thank you for sharing.
I agree that Emotional Independence is very important. Apart from what you have covered which I totally agree, it also impacts on:
1) our communication with others
2) our relationships with others
3) our time management
4) our focus…..
I guess many of your readers can think of more!
I do appreciate you and Michael’s valuable success tips.
Viola Tam
Viola Tam recently posted..Predicting Success with a MLM Success Mindset
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:28
Hi Viola,
thanks for your comment and adding value to the discussion. I agree that emotional independence aka intelligence is many fold. And it something that needs constant practice.
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: marcus_baker
says:
Hi Oliver,
Keen insights shared here in this post as usual.
Most people want whatever it is they want, including money (financial independence) because of how they think it will make them feel. Of course it never does make us feel content for very long because it can’t. It’s when we are emotionally aligned and feeling good purely for the joy that this is, that everything else comes to us.
~Marcus
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:27
Hi Marcus,
thanks for adding value here. Money has the power to make us unhappy or happy. If we are already happy, more money will make us even happier. If we are unhappy, more money will make us an unhappier perspn.
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: WorkingNaked
says:
Your insight on emotional independence is spot on. We can have everything we want (material possessions) but if emotionally we’re in a bad place or unstable, we will lose all of it quickly. I’m still surprised at how many people still think that the more they buy, the happier they’ll be.
Lisa Kanarek recently posted..Working Naked Day is Almost Here
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 30th, 2012 at 19:25
Hi Lisa,
thanks for your comment. Yes, it is a severe error to think “things” can make us happy. If we are unhappy, more things will make us unhappier.
Be blessed
Oliver
P.S.: For some reason, your Gravatar picture doesn’t show up in the comment…
[Reply]
Twitter: WorkingNaked
says:
Oliver- I just updated my Gravatar account so my picture should show up soon. Thanks.
Lisa Kanarek recently posted..Working Naked Day is Almost Here
[Reply]
Twitter: janetcallaway
says:
Oliver, aloha. Loved that you explored this topic. Too often people think if they are financially independent then suddenly everything in their lives will be better. Realistically speaking, few achieve lasting financial independence without working on themselves and becoming emotionally independent.
We need to know who we are, where we stand and be comfortable with ourselves in order to help others. Money doesn’t help people (except perhaps for a loan; different subject), however, speaking confidently, being supportive, problem solving and listening does. If a person is true to themselves they have so much to offer another beyond money.
Let’s face it, Oliver, if you are mentoring me, it is not the size of your bank account that matters. It is the size of your heart and your willingness and ability to share what you know.
Reading this post is a terrific start to the week. Until next time, aloha. Janet
Janet Callaway recently posted..8 Quotes on Success Principles
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
January 31st, 2012 at 09:24
Hi Janet,
great to see you back again
You are speaking the truth…all too often, people follow mentors, coaches etc. who don’t have what they desire. They might have money, but their family life might be a mess. It always boils down to the assumption that we can have both, emotional independence and financial independence, happiness and money, love and money, health and money etc. For some reason, we allow ourselves to be conditioned that we can’t have both…
Thanks for sharing your brilliance.
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: stephan_lacroix
says:
I appreciate the wisdom here Oliver. It’s very simple to understand that we should have emotional independence first and financial independence second…However, people still think that money fixes emotions. I think a great example of that would be the rich and famous coming in and out of rehab centres and still struggling to keep their emotions in sync. The thing is that more money brings more opportunities to drown our negative emotions with drugs, Alcohol, sex, materialism and all of these do the job only for a brief moment. It’s a vicious cycle.
Thank you Oliver.
Stephane
Stephane Lacroix recently posted..Napoleon Hill’s “Think And Grow Rich” Chapter 12 Lesson Plan
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
February 1st, 2012 at 20:25
Hi Stephane,
as a matter of fact, money amplifies emotions. It does so both with negative and positive emotions. A happy person becomes more happy, an unhappy person becomes more unhappy.
Thanks for your comment.
Take care
oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: alexandra_cath
says:
Bravo Michael!
This is a concept which eludes many.
I have always felt deeply that our ability to succeed and thrive in anything, the game of financial independence included, to be commensurate with our ability to grow ourselves, from within. This must come from a place of authenticity to be lasting, as well…
I do resonate with your expression about “the journey” we experience and grow from. – It is not a race, indeed. I also feel that in this journey, when we are connected to it, we are in fact connected to the destination. It’s funny like that, but true nonetheless.
Be here, be real, be open, connect with the self so that from this point of origin we are able to start from the place of authentic growth and development. From here, only good may come of it.
Awesome share! Happily retweeting!
Cat Alexandra
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
February 3rd, 2012 at 09:07
Hi Catherine,
thanks for your comment. You summed it up pretty well, and I love your conclusion: Be here, be real, be open.
Great insights !
Be blessed
Oliver
[Reply]
Twitter: chuckholmes301
says:
All I can say is WOW.
Great post man.
If I could only have one of the two, I would choose emotional independence.
Getting control of your emotions can be a very difficult task. I am naturally and emotional person (aren’t we all?) and have had to work very hard to manage my emotions while growing a business.
I used to have lots of peaks and valleys, but as I get older, it’s more like a constant line (unless you ask my wife
). I’m a work in progress and do whatever I can do keep my emotions in check.
Money is great. Happiness and emotional independence is much more important!
Thanks for sharing man.
Chuck
[Reply]
Oliver Reply:
February 3rd, 2012 at 22:26
Hi Charles,
thanks for your comment.
The truth is: We can have both and we should never say:”If I could only have one of the two…” We can have both and we are all destined to have both.
The same with the words “more important” – what is more important ? What is the comparison ? What is more important – the arm or the leg ?
Be blessed
Oliver
P.S.: Please go to Gravatar.com and connect the email-address you’re using for commenting with a nice photo of you. Here’s how you do it: http://www.sandymaudet.com/how-to-create-your-own-avatar-for-free
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